"poor is the man whos pleasures depend on the permission of another."

when you're not looking...

i just let things get carried away.
and the most important things in my life have gone and removed themselves very very quickly.
i cant hope things to be okay or go back to the way they were.

i don't expect them ever to.
i just hope that everyone and everything that was once a great and amazing part of my life, is now and will be as happy as i always wished they were.
even if i didn't know how to accomplish that myself.

i'm pretty much at a loss for words here so i that's all i have to say.
i thought i tried my best.
but i was wrong.

i could have been a better person, thinking for myself, doing whats right, a better friend.
i didn't have it in me it seems.
maybe some day i will.

lets hope i can clear my head sometime soon.
ya.